Stone in Your Shoe

Hello and welcome. I'm going to talk about how to benefit your excellence code, your excellence skills in situations where there is a problem, where you experience a stone in your shoe. So how to benefit your excellence skills in this situation. I'm going to talk about six topics here, firstly, how important it is to really be clear where you are at the moment, to really make analysis of your current situation, and then also how important it is to be clear where you want to be. Secondly, I'm going to talk about choosing from your existing excellence skills, your strengths, your master skills, your excellence skills, choosing from your existing skills, the one that can help you in your current situation.

Don't worry, you got it. You have experiences that can help you anywhere, in any situation you are facing. And then, when you have chosen from your existing skills, remember that skill, bringing back into your conscious memory, your skill split second, by split second, by split second. And once you have remembered your skill, make a Recipe of it - choosing the most important parts of your skill that make the difference between okay and really good, or okay and excellent. It's choosing those key parts of your skill, and making a recipe of your skill that you can follow. Then as the fifth topic here, letting your recipe work in your current situation. And the sixth topic is to honor your own growth, honor your own achievements, and honor your own success. Because wherever our attention goes, that area grows. Growth happens where our attention is. That's what's important here, to put our conscious attention ion what we already are good at, what is already perfect, and excellent.

So, first thing: where you are at? It's really important to make clear, what the real issue is. Sometimes we are not really clear on what the real issue is. I'll give an example here. Once I had a client, a sports coach. He came to me because he was suffering from exhaustion and he really had some fatigue syndrome symptoms. He came to me and we started working. Within the first session, it had already become clear that the problem was not exhaustion, but it was frustration. Once it became clear to him that his issue was frustration, he was able to give that frustration permission to be. And everything that was related to him being frustrated was processed during that session. What actually happened, was that he gained back his energy and he was able to work again. He said that he was able to really concentrate on the core of his work, which he really enjoyed. He really loved being a coach of a basketball team. That's why it's really important to become clear where exactly you are at. It is also important to become clear where you want to be.

Once you've done your analysis of where you are at the moment and where you want to be, then you can move onto choosing from your existing skills - your strengths, your skills, your excellence qualities - which one could help you further in your current situation. You've got it. We've all got it. You have the answers to all the situations you could ever face. You have experienced by now, being an adult, so much during your whole life that you can find within yourself excellence qualities that you can put to use for your own wellbeing. So choose from your skills, your master skills, your excellent skill, what could help in this situation.

Once you have chosen then move on and remember your skill, your master skill, or your excellence - how you really do it. Really remember your skill, split second by split second by split second. Normally, when we become really good at something, we tend to forget how we do it. You know, our greatest skills, those which we do automatically, and when someone asks how you do what you do, then, we really need to stop and think, "What am I doing?" That's why it's really important to stop and remember, because we are doing so much, so much is happening without us paying conscious attention to what we do. So remembering our skill is important: split second, by split second, by split second.

I've told this example already; I had a beautiful young lady client who came to me when she was applying to university, had applied before once or twice, and she was really nervous about applying again.

So I asked her to remember a similar kind of situation where she would have experienced the difficulty of getting something done, learning something new, or conquering something. At first she said that she couldn't remember anything, but then she actually came up with a beautiful example going to her driver's license test, which was similarly exciting and similarly felt difficult for her. And similarly she didn't pass it first time, but I think it was second or third time that worked. So she started examining this, studying how she had managed there. Then she created her recipe from that old skill where she managed to get through and get her driver's license. She used that recipe when she went for the university tests and she passed, she got her place and started studying. That's why it's really important to choose from the existing skills and then make the recipe: to choose the most important points which made you to succeed, which makes your skill. It's like choosing the most important spices if it was a recipe for food or a cake -making a recipe and fine-tuning it if needed. So, if I remember a skill that I learned when I was a teenager, maybe some parts don't fit me anymore, but I can choose a piece from somewhere else instead, fine-tuning the recipe as needed.

Then let your recipe become part of your current situation, letting your recipe start working on your current situation.

And finally, receive and honor the growth and achievements that you have made.

You may also, if you see around you someone using a skill that you could benefit from, you can fine tune your skill again, adding spice to your recipe from other people, using it in a way that fits you.

I mean, I cannot be anyone else, and I would not like to be anyone else in reality. We very often think that, yes, it would be beautiful to be Person X or someone else. But in reality I doubt we would love to be someone else, but we can always borrow spices from someone else.

I want to share with you that I met my friend Lena a couple of days ago, and she was telling me how she used to organize her calendar after summer holidays. As we know it's turbulent when you have children and you are in the busy years of building your carrier, and your spouse is building his carrier, and you need to take care that your children get to do their hobbies and their schooling done fully, too, et cetera... and how you should take care of yourself at the same time... it really can be a hamster wheel, as we know. She explained to me that each autumn, when children get their timetables and study plans, and when she and her husband get to know about their upcoming projects, she gathered all the pieces of her family autumn rollercoaster together. She was describing this, and said that she was really excited. "I was so inspired really to see how I could form a plan where everything was solved, all rolling along smoothly, and everyone happy, and in that bigger picture I had my own space as well - that I was happy too."

So this is a beautiful example. I was listening with a sensitive ear to her, because I very seldom hear anyone say that the everyday life roller coaster, with all the things that one should cope with, could be an exciting and inspiring task to plan. That's why I really stopped and listened carefully to her - this could be a type of fine tuning - if I had a busy autumn coming up, with lots of things to get organized while taking care of myself, and taking care that everyone's happy in that bigger picture, I could fine-tune my recipe in trying, trying her ingredients, her spices, which were: Excitement and being Inspired. And maybe not in a similar way as she used them, but in my way. I could take to my recipe, I could choose somewhere where I had felt inspired, I could choose ingredients from situations where I had felt excited and joyful. I remember how Lynn looked, she joyful, inspired, and excited.

This is fine-tuning. You can always think, "How could I develop my recipe further?" Look inside, look around, and let it become a part of your current situation, and finally honor your growth, honor your achievements, honor your success, because as we know, where your attention goes, that's where energy grows.

Firstly, know where you are at and know where you want to be. Then choose from your existing excellent skills, your strengths, your master skills, your excellent skills and remembering them.  Fourth, make a recipe, fine-tuning if needed, then letting it become a part of your current situation. Finally honor your growth, your achievements, your success.

Hey, thank you for your time. And if you have any inquiries, I'm happy to answer you. Everything that I've told you today is part of my online course, so if this resonates, please join me in my online course. If you are facing a situation at the moment where you feel that you could use some of your excellence tools, you are always welcome to take part in my course.

I hope you're having a good time, and see you soon. Bye. Marja